Remember That Episode of the Simpsons Where Apu Had 8 Kids?

Cleveland Plain Dealer
June 28, 2003 Saturday, Final / All
SECTION: SPORTS; Pg. D13

Chones triplets to head east

The Chones triplets, who boosted Orange to basketball prominence from 1999 to 2002, have made their college decisions.

Kendall and Kyle Chones, who were Plain Dealer seven-county all-stars as Orange seniors, will play basketball at Colgate of the Patriot League in Hamilton, N.Y. Kameron, also an Orange standout, will play basketball and run track for Ivy League school Brown in Providence, R.I.

Kendall plans to major in computer engineering; Kyle in business management and administration; Kameron in engineering.

Kameron, 6-5, averaged 15 points and 12 rebounds and excelled in track during the last school year at Western Reserve Academy. Kendall, 6-7, and Kyle, 6-6, led Fort Union (Va.) Military Academy to a 28-2 record. Kendall averaged 14 points and 10 rebounds; Kyle averaged 12 points and eight rebounds.

The triplets are the sons of former Cavaliers and Lakers standout Jim Chones.


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Could there be any more annoying way to name your kids than Kendall Chones, Kyle Chones, and Kameron (for god's sake, this is too much) Chones? It's too easy to come up with the sign for when Kameron visits your gym, thank goodness he won't be coming to Bender.

Possible Chones children derogatory signs and things to say:

Kameron is Krappy
Together, you are the KKK
I didn't know that people lost cognitive function after they had triplets. That's interesting.
If there were any more of you, you'd be called a litter. (yeah, I know it's too obvious)
and one which you can probably use on all the kids at Colgate:
You may be smarter and more athletic than me, but at least I won't have people asking me "Like the toothpaste?" the rest of my life.
  @ 9:31 AM